Major League Baseball has placed an asterisk next to Sammy Sosa's skin rejuvenation process, attempting to guard against current and former players looking like complete morons. Sosa underwent an elective skin rejuvenation process that made him look like, well, take a look for yourself.

"We placed a huge asterisk next to this process to warn current and former players that it will cause them to look absolutely foolish," said an MLB spokesman. "I mean steroids are one thing. They make you look big and strong, and allow you to hit lots of home runs. But this skin rejuvination thing made him look like a creepy d-bag. We don't want that."

Sosa said that this process is not a big deal, and everyone is making it a larger issue than it actually is.

"It was just a bad picture," said Sosa through an interpreter, as he has lost the ability to speak English during the treatment to his skin. "The lighting clearly made me look much paler than I actually am. Just like gaining sixty pounds of muscle made me look like a better baseball player."

Comments (0)

Name

Email

Website

Title

Comment

smaller | bigger

Subscribe via email (registered users only)

Write the displayed characters

Add Comment